Everytime i try to fly, i fall without my wings***

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

nw mid year exams le....no time to tink bout those stuffs le...those stuffs brought lots of sadness to my life...ppl step into mio life n den leave juz lyk tat....hmm...bt i thought through everything le...i make myself tink postive...n i did it...finally....i manage to do it...mayb it's nt tat diffcult....bt through tis...i realise who r those who realli care for me...n who r nt....i noe who ll stand b me n who ll nt...mayb tis is nt tat upsetting...bt....i wan to b happy le....i wan to stay positive....i dun wan to let myself down...hmmm...i ll b happy no matter wad happens....anyw...mid year exams period nw...everyone muz jia you worhx....all the best to everyone...may youre do well wif flying colours...jia you jia you...gd luck...signing off...bye bye... :)

p.s you make me realise how cruel ppl can be...
you make me learn how to cry for someone...
but it's also you who wan me to stop crying...

i trust you again n again...
i gt cheated by u again n again...
i gt hurt by u again n again...
i cried for u again n again...

u cheated me once again...
i gt hurt by u again...
i cried for u again...

BUT....I MONT BLAME YOU....COZ I ONLY BLAME MYSELF FOR BEING SILLY...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
2:04 AM

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

OH YA...PPL...TIS COMING FRIDAY GETTING O'LEVEL RESULTS LE...GD LUK TO ALL PPL...SCARY AH...HMM...JIA YOU BA...HOPING FOR THE BEST... *WINKS* =)

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
1:19 AM

hmm...things r nt settled yet ba...i m nt on any sides...i m neutral...both r my frens...i cant make myself help one n neglect the other...dey r my best frens...pls...tell me wad to do...i m v sad when i thought tat i might lose both frens at one go...wad if dey juz walk away fr me?? can i help in anyway?? i realli m nt helping anyone...i feel so tired all of a sudden...i feel tat i m of no help...i m tired of all the quarrels n fights tat r going around in sch...hopefully everything ll come to an end...hmmm....*sigh*
today same same ba...during choir...thought of ytd...ytd nite i listened to 93.3...heard a song through radio...tat song reminds me of......makes me sad...i also dunno y...mayb tat song jux saw me inside out...hmmm...bt i could only afford to spend only a moment thinking of all those stuffs...i m nt going to spend too much time on sad happenings...i wan to b happie...i promised to...n i ll b happie...
tml ll b another long day ba...mayb need ppl stay do class deco...stress ah...got high standard for deco...muz jia you worhx...jia you to all ba...azri have been a great help also...at least we both worked together n nvr quarrel...haas...bt sometime play too much ah we both...haas...let's work together to help 4/8 den...heez...*smile*

p.s zhuzhu n dazhu...u2 have been great...realli...thanks for everything...i realli believe tat frens in secondary life ll b long last frens...hopefully we can..heez...u2 dun keep on going around hitting ppl den say is e other hit de wor...haas...v funny leh...n hoh...dazhu...dun keep hitting me n say is zhuzhu hit de...mdm soh hit de...mrs pang hit de...whoever hit de...haas...in the end, i have lots ppl hit me...muz learn fr zhuzhu...cannot hit me...haas...bt of coz la...he nvr hit me...bt he poke me...haas...u2 gt ur own method to make me awake huh???haas...okie...juz stay happy...*smile*

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
12:25 AM

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

hmm...todae choir was a disaster...hmm..everything nt going smoothly...coz todae is e second day for cca selection...den the choir split into sectionals...my section went to the piano area as usual...hmm..starting still ok ba...after tat when somethings started to happen, evryone in the choir got into the situation n everyone was irritated...everyone was frustrated...coz there's some confict...hmm..dun tink bout it le...juz disastrous...hmm...todae v tired in the morning...wednesday...still gt cca...bt when choir starts, still gt some energy back...dunno y also...automatically ba...haas...ytd nite help zhu do maths till bout 11.45pm...den went to slp as promised...bt when get onto bad, cant slp immediately...roll up n down for some time then slp...haas..seen a pig roll on bed before???nvr rite???coz i also nvr...ytd first time...haas...bleh...hmm...tat's y tis morning v lerthagic..cant blame anyone also...who call me to slp so late everyday??den used to sleeping late le...so lose slp every nite...hmm...eyes pain liao le...dun feel lyk typing le...dunno wad to say also...mayb juz nw choir spoil my mood ba...bt i ll forget everything soon ba...oh ya...today i receive a box of chocolates...ferirro [ issit spelt lyk tat?]....i tink ll bao fei if i eat every single one of it...got 16 in one box...hmm..i tink i ll share wif my friends tml ba...hmm...okie then...take care ppl...love ya...bye bye...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
1:09 AM

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

hmmm...updating in process...haas...anyw update coz some zhu say de...haas...anyw sorrie...pictures n photos ll nt b up so soon...sorrie zhu...got time i put up hoh...anyw tat day on 28jan went to esplanade to watch a concert...by mr nelson something....forget his name...bt it was quite enjoying...bt tiring...coz i was feeling quite tired...bt the coldness in the threatre kept me awake...it was real cold...cold until wont fall asleep...i tink they purposely made it tis way for me...haas...the performance was cute la...the conductor came out with teddy bear...the choir came out with toys also...got elmo somemore...haas...anyw tat day wear till so formal...haiz...so long nt so formal le...cant remember when's the last time i was so formal...teacher say muz formal de ma...bt when i reach sch gate at bout 6.20pm, i was quite shocked...only me n hazel were dressed formally...it's nt tat others were nt formal...it's juz tat me n hazel were real formal in some way compared to others...mi n hazel took photos...we two looked really liked seniors...haas...i wore white...she wore black...we two v pei ba???bleh...so we ended up teasing each other...bt the journey there n back were boring...sian ah...lucky got zhu pei me...he sms me throughout n accompany me worhx...muz thank him real hard....he nvr fails to pei me...i say i bored, he say he ll pei me...i say i ll b late, he say he ll wait n do his homework also...good hoh????u ask him...he say say of coz...coz he is e zhu....bleh.... -_- joking joking worhx....heez...bt on my way home, i passed by 888plaza n saw kfc...den i realised i haven had my dinner...haas...so for somebody's sake, i ate late late dinner at bout 11plus i tink...hmmm...then v full...so nvr slp immediately...drag till 12plus then slp lo...hmm...
the next ay was v tiring...do everything also v restless...tired la.......hmm....i need lots slp...only slp can help...hmm...real pig ah....hmm.... today was ok ba...nothing much ba...oh...dazhu gave me n zhu each a pig badge...thanks worhx...heez...today only know v tired lo...chinese class keep on make myself copy things to stay awake lo...bt when almost sleeping, two ppl start poking me to keep me awake...so there goes my slp...haas...bleh...den ft period discussed bout class tshirt, chinese deco, class boards deco...etc...hmm....so many things...hmm...anyw todae write alot le...next time write again ba...bye bye......take care ppl...smile smile...zhus ah zhus....take care worhx....tis year our year leh...muz make full used of it...oh ya...suddenly remember something v imp...zhu.....THANKYOU for ur nice sweet....i ENJOYED having it...bleh... :p

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
1:04 AM

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

hi ppl...sorrie for nt posting since dunno when...i also lost count...haas...bt life has been fun n full of laughter n happiness for me...envy me???hahaha..jux joking...bt realli..i laughed more than i used to be...all thanks to my zhus n my frens around me...xie xie ni men...haas...without you guys, i wont laugh tat much ba...heez...anyw, i muz realli say dey r v gd at making me laugh...of coz...most of e ideas comes fr tat zhu la...all thanks to him, i got poked almost everyday...it's lyk it has become a daily routine for them to poke me...and i daily routine for me to receive poking as "rewards" fr dem...funny la dey all...haas...zhu ah zhu...thanks for making me happy...i promise i ll stay happy...u n dazhu muz stay happy also worhx...it's a must ah...lyk tat then can pei he me worhx...heez...u2 zhus juz pursue wad you guys want...nvr hesitate too long...happy jiu hao...hmm...suddenly so many things to say...bt dunno how to write everything in words...haas...anyw o'level tis year le...muz study hard hard le...lyk wad miss nora say, "play hard n study hard"...muz say tat ms nora has been a wonderful teacher for me...mayb coz she trust me alot...care for me alot...she's juz lyk a close fren to me...so...hope tat ms nora can stay happy n sexy 4eva...heez...bleh...tis is my last year le...i muz make full use of my time...i muz treasure my frens...i wan stay happy as promised...nvr drop a tear unnecessary...

zhuzhu: u muz stay happy worhx...juz believe in yourself...trust ur feelings...do wad u want n wad u tink is rite...got anythin can tell me de...u muz stay happy leh...if nt nobody pei me laugh le leh...n hoh...all thanks to you...i get poked by ppl around...jr, pq, vance n etc....haas...u muz watched wor...one day i ll do research n find out e correct point to poke de...i ll succeed one day in poking u de hoh..haas...muz look forward to it hoh..anyw sorrie for hiding my emotions fr u at times...i juz dun wan u or ppl around me to worry...bt as promised, i ll tell u n voice out to u next time de...bt of coz, i wan stay happy...smile smile hoh...

dazhu: u ah...muz smile more ma...where's e cheerful dazhu le???lost le huh???dun worry...we ll find it back soon...u smile den ll nice nice ma...be more positive...if u n zhuzhu can b happy by teasing me hoh, i dun mind leh...juz stay happy...u ll make me n zhuzhu worry for u, if u dun smile...we ll b worried for u, wondering if something happened...bt muz say sorrie to u ba...sorry for everything...mayb i have neglected u at times...bt u ll always b the one n only dazhu...nobody can replace u de...we 3 zhus promised to stay together no matter wad happen de ma...bt realli...sorrie...hope tat u can smile more...

ppl out there...be happy always...smile more...it doesnt hurts to smile or laugh...or maybe sometimes, when we laugh too hard...haas...bt it only hurts when we cry or when we r sad...or SMILE more...winks winks... :)

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
12:27 AM

Sunday, December 03, 2006

sorrie zhu2...didnt see u tag...now then blog...u go off le ma??hmm...the next subcom meeting on 13december...at 9am...hmm...is zhu2 decide de rite??hmm...ok...take care...bye...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
9:26 PM

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

hahaaha....now at airport le...using the free internet they have here...veri cool and lucky...i going to board the plane le...hahaha....bye bye everyone...everyone muz take care...i ll miss everyone de...muacks muacks...when youre see tis, i maybe on plane on my way to hong kong le...bye bye...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
5:18 PM

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Happie Birthdae...happi birthdae to me...happy birthdae to angel...happy birthdae to xiaozhu...hahahaha...todae my birthdae...i m out in this world for 15years...yeah!!!!heez....todae muz be happy...heez..but i realli veri unlucky lo...i was sick the day before my birthdae, 12nov...i kept vomitting...dunno y?i tink should b my gastric again lo...but todae i feel better le...todae going to celebrate my birthdae wif my friends...heez...very happy...got lots of ppl...

benson chuanwhai chiewyen peiqi vance honghock daryl hazel sem yixin elaine[2/4] elaine[2/6]....these ppl confirm comin de...

ruiyong dunno whether can rush back from overseas ma? junrong maybe going, coz got npcc meeting...

thanks to these following ppl who sms me their wishes...
peiqi, vance, jackie, yenshan, benson, hana, junrong, yixin, chiewyen, nancy, al...

lata going ntuc to shop for food...then they coming my house to prepare...then we going over to fushan...the basketball court...we celebrating there...i muz thank my friends for helping to organising this party for me...thank you all worhx...

i now only waiting zhuzhu to come back onli...hmm...if he can make it in time to come back to celebrate wif me...hmmm...still waiting...waiting...waiting for his sms...hmmm...it would b good for all three pigs to come together to celebrate..heez...
anyway, todae muz enjoy myself...sad lo...i grow older le...but happy lo...now can make NRIC le...now 15yrs old le...if nt chuan keep making fun of me...say i still 14yrs old...same age as benson...hahaa...hmm...

last but nt least...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ANGEL!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME--HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ANGEL!!!!

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
8:13 PM

Thursday, November 09, 2006

onli juz posted something on blog...but now wan post again le...coz i realli v sad...i nt in e mood to do anything...nt in the mood to talk...nt in the mood to eat...nt in the mood to drink...nt in the mood to do anything...dunno wad's gotten into me...maybe suddenly feel so lost and empty ba...missing zhuzhu...one day haven even pass by...nw is onli 10nov, 12.50pm...afternoon onli...haiz...lata chuan wan play ball...but i nt realli in the mood to play...coz whenever i play ball, i ll tink of zhuzhu...the time when we spend time together playing ball...i ll feel so sad...then when i decided or intend to listen to radio 93.3...like how i used to...to help comfort myself...i ll tink of zhuzhu also..coz we two always listen to radio 93.3 together...tis is our hobby ba...hmm...so wad can i do???missing zhuzhu...zhuzhu got me miss ma??waiting for 13nov to arrive...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
8:51 PM

tis morning, 10nov, at bout 6.45am...zhuzhu left le...he sms me...he was shocked i actually replied...coz he thought i ll b sleeping...hmmm...he wouldnt know i actually nvr slp the whole nite...i onli slept for 2hours...i cant slp...haiz...i think bout lots of things yesterday...suddenly think back of the past also...i came down wif the conclusion that i realli need both zhuzhu and dazhu...they r very very important ppl in my life..i realli rely alot on them...they have leave very big and memorable footsteps in my live...tat time dazhu went of for 10days, i was so sad...suddenly blame myself for nt telling him wad happen when he's nt around...i was so sad...i onli could rely on zhuzhu at tat time...many things happen during tat 10days when dazhu was nt around...i was so devasted...i was still thinking and finding the purpose of livin on tis world...a world which is full of happiness and sadness...full of hopes but in the end nt all hopes can b achieve...tis world has fooled me around for a v long time...at first let me know him, then allow myself to hurt him...i was a fool then...hurtin ppl around me...then came dazhu...allow me to know him and let him to care for me...then off he went overseas...for 10days without him...then zhuzhu was left here in singapore wif me..but he has his own worries...i couldnt get him all the time...but after tat things got better...but nw he has gone off...cuming back onli on my birthdae...when he comes back, 3days lata, on 16nov, it's my turn to leave...tis time i dun have anyone anymore...nt even dazhu and zhuzhu...i have to rely on myself...i ll miss ppl here...i cant imagine wad ll happen to me...nw i onli wan zhuzhu to come back...he promise when he comes back, he ll contact me first...hopefully he can celebrate my birthday wif me...tAt ll b a present to me also...he says it ll b v soon tat he ll come back..i tell myself it's onli a weekend...but tis weekend ll b v long to me...although it's onli 3days, it seems so long to me...now dazhu is e onli here wif me..zhuzhu made me promise him tat i ll take tis time to spend more time wif dazhu...hmm...a promise is a promise...many things happen tis holidays...erm...maybe nt holidays to me...tis days v long and tiring and boring and saddening...it's unfair...forget bout the past..now it's time for me to look forward to e future...i need to b more positive...realli...i dun wan to b so sad le..I WAN TO B HAPPY!!!CANT I JUZ BE HAPPIER?? i so disturbed over tis matter...i cant stop thinking tat i m leaving le...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
5:59 PM

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

today zhuzhu going off le...i ll miss him de...he ll onli come back on 13nov...my birthdae tat day...wad to do without him hurhx??nobody to talk to me...nobody to bully me...hahaa...tat's wad we agree...actually maybe is i bully him more leh...he give in to me more...hahaa..realli enjoy the companionship of zhuzhu and dazhu...they r nice people...erm...wrong...they r nice pigs...hahaa...when we spend time together, i feel tat i m so fortunate to know them...muz realli thank zhuzhu and dazhu...coz they always b there for me...tat's y when they go for trips one after another, i feel so down...dazhu juz come back...then nw zhuzhu want go off le...tonite he go lo...then when zhuzhu come back on 13nov...after a few days i need go off le...i ll b away from 16nov to 21nov...16nov morning 8am muz reach airport...21nov nite then come back...haiz...we three pigs come and go, one after another...i v sad n worried...already in the midst of losing dazhu...wad if zhuzhu come back from trip then lose him again???wad ll happen when im away??i juz suddenly feel tat i have got dazhu back le...i dun wan to lose another one...zhuzhu promise he ll nvr b like dazhu when he returns..but tat time dazhu also promise me...in the end...haiz...nvr mind..it's all the past...muz kan kai yi dian...i trust zhuzhu ba...i juz want time to pass quickly...ok la...muz go lesson le...chuan beside me...calling me to faster...she v bad hoh???hahaa...bye...zhuzhu take care...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
7:11 PM

Monday, October 30, 2006

In life we seldom find a TRUE person.
If you ever find one, hold on and nvr let go.
Value that person coz it's lifes's irreplaceable gift.
Take Care..
--zhuzhu--

You may hear nothing from me.
On how i appreciate on you.
but beyond that silence,
your friendship creates a beautiful sound
IN MY HEART...
--dazhu--

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
11:14 PM

so long nvr update....exam till now...now got a chance to update...hahahahaha....during tis period of time, alot of things happen...i lost some things....i gained some things...i lost him...i found two bestest buddies....we three formed up the bestest group...we r the three piggys...xiaozhu, zhuzhu and dazhu...hahahaha....we r very close....we realli took care of each other...realli...i muz realli treasure this 2 buddies....i realli love them two....they r so thoughtful and they took care of me alot....they r nice to me...I LOVE THEM...I couldnt believe that there r actually ppl who love me tat much....we r the 3 pigs....the three pigs rawks!!!!!XIAOZHU N ZHUZHU N DAZHU RAWKS!!

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
9:04 PM

Thursday, September 28, 2006

todae played a survey game with dazhukor...hahaha...the results turned out unexpectedly...it's nt what i have expected loh...but obviously, the results will nt be accurate de la...cause i know it...all of the results doesnt make sense...take it all easy...dun be so serious...hahaha....bt quite funny la...hahahaha....todae did homework in council room...hahs...the mood inside here so weird...very quiet...i tink cauze everyone very stresed...i also kept quiet loh...hmm...why muz we humans have stress???can we nt have stress???be stress free???mayb ba...hmm...exams cuming le...can die le...dunno whether i have realli studied alredy anot leh???feeling like i got study but like i nvr study like tat...wad's tt???i m mad...nvr mind...love people around me...love you all...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
1:30 AM

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

some people are evil, while others are kind...
some people are pretty, while others are ugly...
some people are unlucky, while others lucky...
some people optimistic, while others are pessimistic...
some people are poor, while others are rich...

so why we only can have one life?

why do we have to yearn for what for what we dont
have and left out what we have?

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
1:04 AM

why is that my tears can onli flow when i m hiding in the cinema, filled with darkness?

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
12:50 AM

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

todae got back our prelim paper two alreadii...
got 50 out of 70...hmmmm.....nt very good after all...
although did quite well for paper two...bt paper one nt up to standard...
so overall, i only get a B3....
suppose to get an A1 or A2 la....
tt's why nt up to standard...
bt happi tat mdm leow says i improve alot on chinese...
ok la....in some way only....still muz work harder...
lot more things to do and study....
o'level coming soon....31 october 2006....
end of year exam also cuming...3 october 2006....
stress liao...no time liao....nvr make good use of time....
how like tat???no mood for everything animore....
i cant go on like tis animore...
i muz get hold of myself....
no more reasons and excuses...
tink of nothing else...
i will be myself....
nothing muz affect me any longer...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
10:49 PM

im sorry...
for all the mean things i have said
im sorry...
for all the things i did or didnt do
im sorry...
if i ever ignored you
im sorry...
if i ever made you feel bad or put you down
im sorry...
for everything wrong i've done

im writng tis because wad if tomoro nvr come

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
10:36 PM

Friday, September 15, 2006

lack of love doesnt hurt.
it only hurt when ur love one forget that you were once in their life.

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
12:10 AM

Thursday, September 14, 2006

it takes a day to love.
but it takes a lifetime to forget.

love like you have never been hurt.
dance like nobody is looking.
sing like nobody is listening.
love like there's no another day anymore.

it was once me who cast a spell on you.
now it's will be me who will break the spell.

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
11:57 PM

Saturday, August 26, 2006

does love equate to submission?

something tat doesnt kill you makes you stronger..

it takes two together...

i will learn to be stronger...

i will learn to live without you....

but can i do it???

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
4:58 AM

Friday, August 18, 2006

in my life, i learnt:
how to love.
how to smile.
how to be happy.
how to be strong.
how to work hard.

but i didnt learn how to forget you.
take care...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
8:52 PM

please leave silently without letting me know....

i will miss you...

love will eventually return...

i will never forget you...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
8:48 PM

Thursday, August 17, 2006

happiness is worth waiting for...
happiness is worth yearning for...
happiness is worth everything...
or maybe to you it's worth nothing anymore...
maybe there's no happiness for you anymore...
there's nothing to be happy for now...
maybe you want to let go...
we nvr know wad wil happen...
only you will know the answer yourself...
i nvr wan to ask...
coz i m afraid the answer will hurt me...
let the answer lie between us...
nvr telling me...
even if it realli hurts me,
dun tell me...
if you want to leave,
leave silently...
tell me nicely...
nvr be fierce or unhappy...
i will take the consequences then...
i will always love you...
and you will alway be in me...
trust me...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
12:28 AM

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

waiting is a beauty...
everything is worth waiting for...
i will always be there waiting for you...
never leaving you...

is everything worth waiting for???realli???i dunno...i realli dont...maybe yes...maybe no...
many things happen nowadays...but wad can i do leh???i should have expected all this to happen ba...
is i too naive le...haiz...but maybe everything will be fine soon...very soon...very soon...i will wait...wait patiently...still waiting patiently...i will always wait...waiting for an answer...i will nt let anything affect me...i dun want to make my friends worry bout me animore...i will try to be strong...everything is there to be...

[blowing the flute at the crack of dawn]
2:01 AM